Love to love. I love being in a relationship that brings me peace and fulfillment, that makes me dream every day and feel excitement. But it’s not always like that, because every partner brings with them little flaws that sometimes shake the harmony in the relationship. That’s why we need to remember the basic rules of long-term relationships, which both partners are obliged to respect.
These are rules that come naturally from the moment you get involved in a relationship, but which we sometimes forget when grey clouds threaten our relationship. That’s okay, we’re here to remind ourselves of them together. If you think it’s necessary, jot them down in the diary you keep with you every day and take a look at them when appropriate.
Pay attention to what the other person says
You may have a partner who doesn’t usually open up to people, even to you, no matter how much you love each other, so when you catch a moment like this, you’d do well to give yourself to them completely. Be there, be present body and soul and don’t let a word escape you. Don’t interrupt him to give him advice (maybe he just wants you to listen, not to find the solution to his problem), don’t say every time “I know what it’s like, I’ve been there, let me tell you about it” and don’t show interest in anything else while he’s talking to you.
And this applies not only in cases where one partner is a closed nature, but in any discussion between two people who form a couple. Pay attention to what the other is saying and you might get some answers you’ve been waiting for, to questions you’ve only been thinking about.
Talk about passions, dreams and plans
You’re making a big mistake if you don’t talk to each other about the passions that excite you every day, the successes at work, the dreams that, even if they don’t come true, give you strength.
Talk and motivate each other, inspire each other, and together you can carry out many beautiful plans.
Respect him at all times
Respect him at all times, especially when you are in a group. If something bothered you about him, don’t let everyone around see it, wait until it’s just the two of you and then you can tell him what bothered you. Don’t make jokes about him or make fun of him in front of friends.
It doesn’t matter that others are more joking and might understand your corny jokes, but it’s better to be an example of respect. Plus, people are mischievous and at some point someone might start some rumors about you as a result of jokes they didn’t get.
Did you make a mistake? Apologise
Admitting you’re wrong is proof of love and respect. It’s frustrating to argue with someone who either always wants to have the last word, always thinks they’re right, or never admits they’re wrong. It’s frustrating and leads to the deterioration of any relationship.
Even if you’re more prideful of sorts, there’s no such thing in love. In love, honest feelings are offered and there is no room for “which is which”. Even if you happened to be 100% convinced that you weren’t wrong, but later realised that it really was your fault, admit it and ask for forgiveness. An “I’m sorry” solves all problems.
Don’t steal each other’s air
I understand your crazy desire, because I even happen to miss him even though a wall separates us. When you’re in love, every part of you yearns for him every second of the day and night, but trust me, it’s vital that you give each other time off. And not just because there’s a risk of you getting bored of each other, but also because, although you may not realise it at the time, you both have your own individual needs.
Mine said to me: “you should meet up with your girlfriends again, because I’m aware that some things you can’t discuss with me”. Yes, as open as I am to him, there are discussions that only with my very good girlfriend can I have, and it does me good.
Furthermore, while in the psychologist’s office, I learned that a ceiling is supported by two walls that are far apart, and if we tried to glue the two walls together, the ceiling would fall down… so would the relationship.
Resolve your problems
If you’ve encountered a problem as a couple, if something is bothering you about it, talk about it and work it out together. It’s not healthy to hold onto your anger and negative thoughts. When you both know about the problem, together you will be able to get over it.
An unresolved problem now, an unresolved problem next time… will lead to loss of trust and an unhappy ending to the relationship. So, resolve it early!
Don’t let the flame of passion go out
After a year or two of crazy love, exchanging exciting messages, surprise photos sent when you’re far apart, candlelit baths and sleepless nights spent together, comfort comes in. We already know each other very well, we’ve been through all the phases, we’re sleeping on the ear that the other is guaranteed for the rest of our lives, so we don’t put in any more effort. Intimate moments are on the run, we don’t stop to admire each other, we don’t do anything to arouse it. Oh, but what a mistake!
That’s all I’m saying: don’t give up provocative underwear, don’t give up whispering a naughty wish in his ear when you’re out in public, and don’t give up playing. Stay the chick of his fantasies.
Don’t go to bed angry
Or don’t leave the house after a small argument. Tomorrow is not guaranteed, nor is the relationship we’re in, so why let the seconds tick by out of stubbornness or pride? Are you upset? Communicate, clarify and keep loving each other.
Let it go, it doesn’t matter! Be the “sucker” and you’ll enjoy it more. Trust me, just because you caved first doesn’t mean he won the fight, which is why he won’t hold on seeing you wave the white flag either. Next time, remembering your reaction, he might drop his first.
The important thing is that at the end of the evening you both know how much you mean to each other. And there’s nothing more soothing than falling asleep looking at the one you’re in love with.