Step 1: The meeting
Step 1 may vary depending on the person and the meeting. There are two steps:
Love at first sight: The famous, long-awaited love at first sight, that timeless moment when the world stops turning and the light only falls on one and the same person. When we fall in love at first sight, we don’t really fall in love with the person we meet, we fall in love with the idea we have of them and the fantasized relationship we could live with them.
From reality to dream: This case is more common (80%): we meet a person, we distinguish some of their characteristics in a more or less objective way. The more the days go by, the better we are with her, it’s the crescendo of love.
In both cases, this first stage can be compared to a dream, to a beautiful idyll where only the qualities are there.
Step 2: The state of love
Your relationship has been going on for a little while, you are happy, well in your sneakers, there aren’t really any shadows in the picture. You both have plans for the future: why not buy together? A child? A dog? Life’s goals seem to be common to both of you and everything is going for the best in a state of semi-reality.
During this so-called “passion phase”, we have this intoxicating feeling that with this person we will only experience happy days. That no shadow could come to tarnish this marvelous picture. So, we often want to rush things: to see each other often, to live together, to have children?
Then the second phase comes…
Step 3: Routine
Routine can hinder many couples when it is not accepted by both partners. The real problem is not having a few habits in the relationship… The problem exists from the moment both partners think that the couple is a natural state and from the moment there is love, there is no effort to be made. If you don’t feed your couple, if you don’t spice it up, if you are not ready to compromise for the other, then the relationship is hardly viable.