Social networks take up a slice of our lives, but what about life as a couple? Some thoughts on how and how much to share on social.
There is nothing wrong with sharing a few moments as a couple on social media, but perhaps we have all stopped at least once to weigh up the consequences and implications of such a simple gesture as posting a photo or video. What should remain private and what can be shared lightly?
Social networks are now an integral part of our existence: although not all of us share every aspect of our lives on the various platforms, escaping their pervasive presence is indeed complex. While each of us can choose and modulate our presence on social networks, being part of a couple often complicates things.
Social can be a place of positive sharing, but it is also sometimes easy to lose sight of the limit. Every precious and happy moment is no longer just ‘ours’, but belongs to everyone, potentially even strangers. And while it comes naturally to us to share something that makes us feel good, it would be better to stop and think: is it right to share selfies, videos, phrases, dedications or even gifts you receive from your boyfriend or girlfriend?
Far from dictating rules – everyone has their own – in this article we have tried to put together a few things to always keep in mind when sharing couple content on social media.
- PROTECT YOUR PHYSICAL CONTACT
The first point to emphasise is privacy. We are so used to sharing what we eat, what we see, what we read that the concept of physical contact now has a different form for everyone. But when one is in a couple, one should also respect the opinions of others. Taking a selfie is no longer a memory, but a moment to be shared immediately on Instagram or Facebook.
The constant use of social networks can be addictive: we all know the gratifying feeling of likes and comments from friends telling us how good a couple we are. But think carefully: do you need this to know that your relationship is healthy? If you think it’s nice to have a photo album of memories at your fingertips using social platforms, consider whether it wouldn’t be better to opt for a good, old-fashioned, printed photo album instead.
- YOU MIGHT BE SWAYED BY THE JUDGEMENTS OF OTHERS
It sounds silly, but it really isn’t: nowadays, people on social media have no brakes. Compared to the past, when people were a bit afraid to speak their mind and thought long and hard before speaking out, nowadays a quick comment, two sentences on the keyboard are enough to break the most stable equilibrium, and this can also happen on the part of those closest to you.
A couple conflict could arise. A comment or appreciation could annoy you and your he or she, or trigger jealousy. Perhaps, it is better to let it go, to publish only what is necessary. Because the best memories should be personal, stored in the hearts and eyes of those you love.
- HAPPINESS MUST BE LIVED
This is perhaps the most important point among the reasons we have chosen to give you the urge to put your phone aside. Think about happiness: would you rather share it with strangers on Facebook or experience every emotion in the company of your partner? Why do we sometimes feel the need to share all our innermost thoughts about love? Why don’t we simply live the relationship?
Falling in love is good for the heart and enjoying the first weeks or months of a relationship is something special that will never be repeated within the couple. Yet, it seems that the peak of publishing love photos and thoughts occurs during the early stages of a new relationship. Give yourself time, give yourself a respite from social media. They are not a job nor are they your life. Appreciate the chance to be happy. Take advantage of this golden period.
- RESPECT THE OTHER PERSON’S WISHES
Especially if yours is a newly formed relationship, ask of course, before posting, if it might not bother you. If your he or she has a social media allergy, stop and think. Maybe it’s a given for you to share a photo or video of you together, or do a story on Instagram. Relationships on social, however, can quickly degenerate.
Social pressure exists, which is why many people either develop an addiction to it or suffer from it. It also depends on one’s personality, whether one’s character is reserved or not, or one’s style is more outgoing. Basically, always remember that we are not all the same, we each have different needs. Respect his wishes, especially if he does not wish to show too much of himself to the world.
- WHAT YOU PUBLISH, STAYS ONLINE
Yes, you read that right. Everything we post online, stays online. Even when we delete a photo, it will unfortunately remain in some database, far from our power to act. This is why there should be more attention paid to what we upload online, especially when it comes to photos and videos.
How best to experience relationships on social at this point? Sure, something you can share, but not too much. Some of your emotions and your experience keep it to yourself, protect it from prying eyes and, yes, even from the unexpected judgments of people you know.