The number of people in the world who find it difficult to find their other half is growing. What if you want a close relationship but still can’t find the right partner? It turns out that what we get is not what we want, but what we are.
Helps you discover your strengths and weaknesses
If we were alone, we would live quietly, without changing anything, without reproaching ourselves, without demanding too much of ourselves, and we would make our own agenda and be satisfied with that. But if we did not interact with anyone, it would take us much longer to find out who we are, what qualities we have and what we lack.
When there is another person around, we have to adapt to them, to compromise, to find dialogue. And through this communication, it is possible to notice qualities that you have not noticed before. The other person is like a mirror – revealing your tiredness, your flaws, your weaknesses, your strengths. Therefore, even if you disagree with certain observations, this friction makes you wonder why it is so, why I am so. For example, you feel tired in the evening after work, and your behaviour with your other half shows whether you are patient, whether you get angry quickly, whether you are selfish or self-sacrificing, and where you still need to change and improve.
Finding what we need
What if you have met someone you think is not right for you? First, ask yourself why someone with those qualities has come into your life.
Although you may find it hard to believe, you probably have qualities that attract each other, and therefore are similar, complementary, and fulfill your expectations. There may also be situations that will be useful to both of you, that will make you learn certain things. In reality, it is not what we want that we get, but what we are.
That is why some women who have taken on the role of victim in their lives attract abusive men. People who are complementary and needy often come together.
The opposite can also be true: women who want peace and comfort find reliable, supportive men to carry them around. And if you keep thinking that you don’t know if you want a serious relationship, that you don’t deserve it, that you’re not worthy, you may find it hard to find your other half.
Annoyed by someone else’s behaviour? What does it say about me?
Until your dream partner is there, let’s learn from those who show you attention. Every person around us is a teacher and we need to be very attentive if we want to know ourselves better. Maybe this time, the reality of sending the wrong person gives us a chance to grow into the right person for you. Then ask yourself what you can learn from the present situation. If you don’t really like a certain character trait in another person, ask yourself why. It is probably because you have one yourself.
Don’t like the fact that your loved one throws socks everywhere? But maybe you’re not a big pedantic person and you’re always leaving dishes in the dishwasher? Do you blame the constant lateness? But maybe you’re overly stressed out by telling everyone to come even earlier than agreed? Do you dislike your neighbour because he keeps coming to ask to borrow money? Maybe he is just revealing your greed? You resent the beggars on the street, but maybe they are a subconscious reminder that you once did not help someone?
Think about what characteristic of another person you don’t like very much and try to analyse why that might be – you’ll discover some very interesting things. The environments and situations and people we attract are reflections of ourselves, or important lessons for us to learn. Women reveal themselves next to men, and men next to women.