A mature, balanced love relationship based on mutual respect and support, honesty and empathy is a healthy couple relationship that has a chance to beat time. Here are some of the most common tests of life that a strong couple will pass.
The Fall Test
There will be situations in a couple, especially in long-term relationships, when one partner will have a breakdown. Either they will lose their job, fall prey to a vice disrupting family harmony, or both partners go through a period of crisis, suffering, war or poverty.
Healthy relationships manage to withstand such situations and eventually turn evil into good. These partners trust each other, accept each other’s help (especially in the case of addictions and dependencies), team up with each other and together, step by step, make each day as good as possible. The two of them do not tire of making efforts to make a life together again easy, beautiful, and happy.
The temptation test
Temptations and unhealthy curiosities constantly surround us: maybe we would like to know what is on our partner’s phone, perhaps we are hiding a sum of money to fulfill a dream, maybe we are hiding something else, and sometimes we meet people more interesting than our couple partner.
These are all pitfalls. Especially the last one. In a long-term relationship, it’s almost impossible that, at some point, we won’t meet someone who, at least at the time, is more and more than our partner. Maybe someone is more intelligent, prettier, prosperous, empathetic, tender, and so on. But that doesn’t mean it’s time to cheat or break up for more and more partners.
Suppose we chase after records, looking for the best partner. In that case, we will most likely end up alone because there will always be someone else and more, which prevents us from building something beautiful and valuable with our loved ones. Stability in relationships is not a competition; it’s fit.
The personal time test
We each choose how we want to live that personal time, all our own. In healthy couples, partners give some of this time to each other; they do it independently, without feeling it is an effort. Partners who have built their love seek out, want, and accept each other.
The test of each other’s freedom
You know those activities we want to do as a couple? But if one partner doesn’t want or like that activity, is it okay to restrict or criticize them?
Partners give each other space and freedom when the relationship is built on respect, trust and empathy. Freedom in a couple is already a concept much discussed by specialists. On this topic, we recommend you read.
The happy period test
There are also periods when one or both partners are doing very well. Here is where that partner can feel strong and will act on their inner honesty. It often happens that, in such situations, the strong one separates from the partner. Perhaps he had wanted this for a long time and could not; maybe now other people have come along to whom he has access, and he feels it is worth living differently.
In any case, these situations are accurate tests for a couple. And only healthy relationships pass this test.
The test of illness or helplessness
How does a partner react when the other becomes ill, perhaps unfortunately with a chronic illness, suffers an accident, goes through psychological trauma or has to deal with surgery?
These moments when one partner is going through a very vulnerable time are, in fact, a moment of crisis for the couple.
How they rewrite their relationship reflects their ability to overcome the moment, or… it heralds a break-up.
The social pressures test
Society forces us towards different patterns of living our lives, which vary from culture to culture. Maybe some families are more traditional and impose these rules on young people, maybe one partner wants to get married, and the other thinks it’s just an act, maybe one or both want children and can’t conceive them.
There are many problems and differences related to certain expectations of ourselves. Of the couple, expectations instead learned from societal patterns. In such situations, many couples get stuck.