We all know the importance of compliments in our lives and the lives of our loved ones. But have you ever thought that some words meant to be nice could do more harm than good? Here are a few of the most common compliments that can hurt our partner.
I love you, but…
That “but…” hurts after any compliment we say, especially after we try to express our love.
That’s because our love shouldn’t be conditional on anything. However, there were undoubtedly some “pretensions” when we chose our life partner. But it would be nice not to tie them to a declaration of love, which we all want to hear: “I love you”.
I’m impressed that you managed.
When we rejoice in someone’s success, it’s good to show our joy, not our surprise.
Perhaps the other person is expecting confidence and support from us, not the other way around, not trusting that they will succeed, which is why we are surprised and impressed.
By showing confidence in the other person but not putting the pressure of success on their shoulders, we grow closer to our loved ones and support their self-confidence.
It suits you; this look makes you look younger.
Perhaps some choices regarding clothing, hairstyle, hair colour and other image details suit us better, help us look more beautiful, more groomed, maybe even younger.
If around 30, you don’t mind the number of years so much, it’s likely that later on, the hint of your age will bother you, even when you’ve made the choices that help you look “younger”.
A nice gesture on your part, but…
I’m sure that the person we love often tries to surprise us in the most excellent way possible, to help us, and to be a team.
It is nice to compliment the gesture and the intention. Still, these compliments are better not to be followed by any other remark, more briefly without “but…”.
For example, if our partner is helping us with the washing up, perhaps we should find a gentler way of telling them, sometimes, so as not to spoil the beauty of the moment, that they could apply another technique that involves less wall-splashing.
And if he’s helped us with the vacuum cleaner, perhaps we shouldn’t point out that he’s forgotten a corner of the room. Indeed our partner also has their observations that concern us directly. Of course, we want them to communicate diplomatically.
We all know the importance of compliments in our lives and the lives of our loved ones. But have you ever thought that some words meant to be nice could do more harm than good? Here are a few of the most common compliments that can hurt our partner.
Thanks for the surprise/gift, but you didn’t have to…
If your boyfriend/girlfriend has chosen to surprise us with a gift or has planned a surprise, indeed, this is his or her choice, his or her pleasure, and indeed, he or she should have.
We try not to refuse each other’s efforts to spice up the relationship and try not to fall into the trap of routine and monotony.
Psychologists say that even the most successful relationships need support from their partners because nothing falls from the sky and doesn’t stand on its own. So involving both partners in the couple’s life is necessary and proper and promises a beautiful future together.
Compliments are helpful in any relationship, not just a couple’s, done when appropriate and in moderation. Those around us can easily interpret words, so it is advisable to pay attention to the nuances of our messages.