A toxic couple’s relationship can be a precious gift.

You’re beautiful, you’re unique, and you have so much joy to give. I know it’s hard to hear those words when your heart is shattered to pieces, and you feel like everything is crumbling around you. You can’t bear to hear one more person say good things about you because if they were true, none of this would be happening to you.

The man next to you would treat you with respect; he would adore you like he does other women you secretly envy. I understand; it’s happened to me. I’ve had moments where I wished I was someone else, or simply not.

But a toxic couple relationship is not the end of the world, and in no way does it have to be the end of you.

A toxic couple relationship can be the beginning of the end of the toxic relationship you have with yourself.

Criticizing yourself daily is not self-love. Neither is looking in the mirror and chasing your so-called flaws. Nor putting yourself last. Nor neglecting your emotional health. And by no means let yourself fall prey to the torrent of negative words.

When I’ve been in a toxic relationship, my biggest enemy has been my mind, not the other person’s. Caught up in the movie playing the victim, I forgot to look inside myself and focused on what was being done to me.

But one day, a good friend advised me to approach the situation with new eyes and a fresh perspective. That was when I decided that instead of looking at what he was doing, I would look at what I was doing and what I said, what I thought.

Gradually, I rediscovered myself. I reminded myself of my gifts and talents. Of all that I have achieved. The challenges I overcame made me stronger. Of the love letters, I received in my twenties. I rehearsed who I was every night before bed. And so I came to believe in myself again, rejoice when I received compliments, and let go of the past.

My toxic relationship was no longer a nightmare but a precious gift, an opportunity to build a better life.

You are beautiful, you are unique, and you have so much joy to offer!