The partner can satisfy our needs
How does affection for a person begin? Usually with the fact that we like someone visually. We project our ideal image of a partner onto him or her and subconsciously think that he or she can give us exactly what we are looking for. If he or she then actually has certain characteristics and aspects that are important to us and attract us, we believe that we have found the person who may be the perfect match for us. Whether this encounter has potential for more becomes apparent in the time that follows. If we additionally feel very comfortable with this person, the basis for falling in love is perfect.
Many things in common
There is the saying “opposites attract”, but experience has shown that “like attracts like” simply works better. It doesn’t always have to be common interests that can be a reason for falling in love. Identical views, similar values and similar priorities in life are often the basis of a lasting partnership.
Sometimes we fall in love with someone we have known for a long time or who is regularly around us. This is because we can judge him quite well, know what he likes and also what qualities we like in him. But why, for example, does a friendship suddenly turn into love after years? The reason is often changed life circumstances: Were one or both of the partners previously committed, do they now spend more time together than before, or are things and problems that previously distracted them out of the way?
Relationship with parents
We often hear about the so-called father complex, which can actually strongly influence the choice of partner for some women. This is because our father is usually the first male reference person we ever have. He shapes our image of a man, which is why it can happen that our partner may have certain similarities with him – be it only the eye color, hair color or stature. It can become more extreme in cases where a woman has suffered from a very dominant or even violent parent as a child or teenager. According to studies, these actually tend to look for a partner with similar traits later on. And if at that time one always longed for the love of a mother or father, as an adult one not infrequently ends up with someone who is similarly bad at expressing his or her feelings.