Prioritize and take care of each other
Rituals or traditions can be important in a relationship. Rituals are something that keep couples together and ensure that they set aside time for each other or their families.
In longer relationships, we become closer to each other and each other’s friends and families. Our social network expands, but it can also be too much of the same.
Don’t forget that it’s you two – against the world. It is you and no one else who should make decisions about how you want to live your life – you are a team. Time is important in a relationship. It’s easy for things to become routine once you’re in a relationship and you forget about each other, you’re busy with all the other things going on around you. What did you do at the beginning of your relationship? Did you go on dates? Plan some such activity you both enjoy from time to time!
It’s incredibly important that you see and acknowledge each other and take the time to hang out, just the two of you. If your partner is ill, call home to check on them and give them a thought. Buy them something on the way home from work, or make them some hot chicken soup to show them that you’re there for them, even when things are tough.
Divide up the household chores
One important thing is to divide household chores between you so that everything gets done as efficiently as possible. As a result, there will be more time left over to spend with each other. Whether you have children or not, weekends tend to be full of errands and chores that you don’t get to do during the week. If you notice that your partner is busy, help out without your partner having to ask or ask for help.
Make sure to share the tasks you have between you and base it on your personal strengths – not because of gender roles or to be politically correct – swap tasks from time to time. If there’s something your partner absolutely hates to do, ease up and take on that task instead. It’s up to you to make everyday life easier for each other, regardless of what society or the environment says. Even if you’ve both divided the chores at home, you’re still building something together.
Make sure that you are pulling in the same direction, that you want the same things, and that you both want the same results from your life.
Personal time and self-love
For a good and stable love relationship, it is important not to forget about yourself. We all have our own goals in life and our own interests.
It is not uncommon for people starting a relationship to give up on their goals and end up with their interests. Your own goals and interests are important and things you love to do.
There is a great risk of losing yourself in a relationship and constantly talking in “we” terms. But loving yourself and doing things for your own sake is important for both parties if the relationship is to last. If you are constantly together and never do anything separately, you risk having less energy and love for your partner.Giving up your goals and interests in a relationship can result in you feeling trapped and unfulfilled.
Whether it’s achieving some goal at work or in your personal life, it’s important to realise that this is something big in a person’s life and something that should never be denied in a relationship. Instead of denying yourself or your partner this, you should encourage and support each other in this instead. Of course you have to adjust your goals or interests because you are after all two in a relationship and you share your life, energy and time with your partner, but you should never give up on either. You should be able to be independent in a relationship, including your partner. It’s about being able to do what you want, have time for yourself, etc.
If you don’t get your own time in a relationship, sooner or later it will backfire.
You have to create space for each other in a relationship, but also give each other space to be themselves.
Communication
Communication is key in a relationship, but it’s also true in all areas such as work, family and friends, etc. You need to communicate to tell each other how much you love each other, what is right or wrong, what your boundaries are, sort out problems, clear up misunderstandings, etc. Share both positive and negative things. It is incredibly important that important opinions and rules about how your relationship should work are clear from the very beginning of your relationship.
What is okay and what is not okay? Children, marriage, sharing? Set boundaries where necessary and sort out misunderstandings as soon as possible. It’s not good to sweep something under the carpet and think it will go away on its own. Couples in long-term relationships know that there is no point in lying and withholding things. They talk out the problems before it’s too late! If your partner has an ugly habit that makes you irritated, you need to handle the situation with some finesse.
There’s no point in nagging; it’s smarter to tell them as soon as possible what’s bothering you and why it’s making you irritated – and that should be enough once.
Don’t nag, give them time to replace the bad habit with a new and better one. People are creatures who can’t change overnight, no matter how much you want and nag.
It’s okay, even refreshing, to live in a relationship where there are refreshing discussions about everything between heaven and earth, but if one of you always has to have the “last word”, the discussions can develop negatively and ruin your relationship.
If you know you don’t click in certain areas, learn to work on them or around them. Being able to talk about everything without always having the same opinions strengthens a relationship, but you don’t always have to have a winner or a loser. In addition to being able to talk and discuss everything under the sun, it’s understood that you actually listen to what your partner has to say and don’t turn a deaf ear and only listen to what’s interesting. Be present in your partner’s life and set aside some time each day to talk to and listen to your partner, either when you see each other or over the phone, about their life and what it has been like that day.
Confidence and security
Mutual trust and confidence is very important in a relationship. It doesn’t matter how in love you are with each other if one of you doesn’t trust the other. If you can’t trust each other, the relationship is doomed to fail. This affects both parties in a relationship and many times leads to conflict. Trust is something that can be built, but for a relationship to work, both parties need to trust each other fully. Be trustworthy, don’t repeat mistakes and be honest.
Security is about more than trust and confidence. You should feel safe with each other. If there is no security, it doesn’t really matter how in love you are, the relationship will struggle to last. Always treat your partner with respect and make them feel as safe as possible. Your relationship is a safe haven from everything going on around you. It is the two of you against the rest of the world and what you have in common should make you feel safe and comfortable.
Appreciation and support
Appreciate your partner’s qualities, appearance or their achievements. If they have done something to themselves, dressed differently or done something special for you, show it. You know yourself how much fun it is when your partner praises you for something you’ve done, don’t you? Appreciation is something very positive in a relationship and makes you grow. However, everything must be in moderation then and not lead to exaggeration as it will have the opposite effect. If your partner travels a lot for work or if you have different work schedules, it’s just as well to talk about it over the phone.
If only one person is always supporting the other, there will be an imbalance. We all have good days and bad days, and the person who is always strong sometimes needs to be supported and be able to show weakness. Whether it’s your family, a difficult colleague or something your partner wants to achieve, support is extremely important and should of course come from both sides.
Moral support and strength must alternate in a relationship, which is about being able to give and take. There is no one person who is always strong and can be strong all the time. No one wants to live in a relationship where one partner does not defend their partner in front of family and friends. If you don’t stand up and support each other, there’s really nothing holding the relationship together.