It is said that it is difficult for modern people to find their other half. It’s as if everyone is walking around… Psychologists also confirm this. But what is it that some people do wrong that they keep failing to find someone close to them and the door keeps closing?
First of all, it feels good to be alone
Psychologists say that you shouldn’t look for your other half when you’re going through a difficult phase in your life.
When a person is struggling, frustrated, unhappy, they give off the same emotions. After all, it is a well-known saying that ‘like attracts like’. Although it is not guaranteed, there is a chance that you will attract the same unhappy person. At first it may seem that you have met your soul twin, but what do you do with two unhappy people who may become even unhappier in the long run?
If you want to find your other half and build a truly beautiful relationship, you first have to deal with your resentments and other negative experiences in life. In other words, you have to feel good and happy when you are alone. Don’t think that happiness only comes when you find your other half. Think about it, when you are happy, that is the kind of people you attract without even thinking about it. Are you going through a difficult phase in your life? See a psychologist, do some spiritual practices, find peace. And then maybe you will discover your other half without trying very hard.
The right signals
Women often complain that there are no normal men around them, that they are not serious, that they look down on relationships. But women often don’t realise that they themselves are sending out signals that attract men who are not serious. Let’s take the simplest example – notice what picture you have on a social network. What message is it sending? Are you serious, smiling, or are you too s**y? If you dream of a serious relationship, a real long-term partnership, it is definitely not a good idea to post a picture of yourself that is too s**y. This is quite dangerous, as you may only attract men looking for a one-day adventure. And when you go out with them, you will once again be disappointed that there are no normal men out there, even though you have actually attracted one yourself. The same rules apply to your dress, your behaviour and the places you go for entertainment.
Are you making enough effort?
Some women tend to think that they can’t lift a finger to find their other half – they have to find them. However, this is a wrong way of thinking, because if we do nothing, happiness will not come to us. We have to work for it. And we don’t have to go over our heads, sometimes being socially active is enough to open the right doors and meet the right people. So don’t just stay indoors, go to events, attend conferences, socialise with friends and acquaintances. And by the way, the rule of thumb is to go where you like, you are more likely to meet someone like you, and your views will be aligned on many things.
Don’t underestimate yourself
Many women talk about the difficulties of finding a mate, especially at a more mature age. They are afraid of different things: looks, attitudes, and their own grievances about past relationships. As a result, they often take it upon themselves to underestimate themselves. Women are often dissatisfied with their appearance, and men don’t even bother to make an effort.
However, one should not really underestimate oneself, because many people have the same thoughts and it is an illusion that others look better. Psychologists say that both men and women rate their rivals much higher than they rate themselves. So we shouldn’t get too worked up about it. And think about it, if you underestimate yourself, will you be able to find the right mate?
Have a list of qualities of the perfect partner
Having standards, knowing what you want, is really cool. And you probably know what qualities your chosen one should have. But look at this list very carefully and critically. Do you think this kind of man or woman even exists? No one is perfect, so your other half should not make a list that you yourself hardly match. It is important to be realistic. You can meet the perfect person anywhere, so don’t be quick to judge them by made-up standards or lists. After all, you wouldn’t want to be judged by a list and not even try to get into your personality.
Let go of the past
It is only when someone leaves your life that there is room for someone else to emerge. This applies to many areas of life, even relationships. If you are still in a relationship with an ex-boyfriend or girlfriend, secretly hoping to be together, but at the same time looking for another other half, nothing good will come of it. Think about how another person can want to be in a serious relationship with you if you are in chaos inside, undecided about what you want and what you want. First of all, break the old ties and let a new happiness come into your life.