Let’s be clear from the start: a break-up is always difficult, and most of the time we wonder if it was a good idea to end it. It’s perfectly natural. However, if months, or even years, have passed and you notice the following six signs, you might be in trouble. In this case, it’s worth taking a moment to dig deeper into your emotions.
Compare
Whenever you meet or get to know someone, you are comparing them to your ex-lover, wittingly or unwittingly. Did your ex prefer your favourite music, know the books you like to read, or was he even taller? The point is more about why you notice these things.
You dream with him
The fact that he sometimes appears in your dreams is not a big problem. But if it’s two or more times a week, it’s probably still very much present in your thoughts – even subconsciously. And there’s only one explanation for this…
Compassion
In the world of social media, it’s inevitable that you’ll know (almost) everything about each other even after a breakup. (Unless, of course, you use the ban-delete method on all interfaces.) If you see something good happen to her, you rejoice with her, if she’s at a loss, you grieve with her – it’s pretty suspicious. Emotionally, you are probably still attached to him.
Your friends are already noticing
None of your friends can expect your ex not to occupy every second thought after your breakup. But if you’re somehow weaving him into every conversation, every single comment reminds you of him, you’ve got bad news… And those closest to you probably already know it.
You immediately think of him…
…when something bad happens to you. Whether it’s a little fight with your parents or a problem at work, if you’re feeling a little down, you immediately feel you need him. That’s because you’re used to being able to rely on him when you need a little emotional support. But after the break-up, you have to go to a new place for that.
You only remember the nice things
There are always bumps between two people, the perfect relationship doesn’t exist. And yours certainly wasn’t, because something ended it. Never forget that, if you have to, keep mantraising it in your head until it sticks – especially if nostalgia makes everything look bad and you only remember the good times.
Before you close this article, we’d like to remind you of something: just because you’re having these feelings now doesn’t mean they won’t go away. Before you rush headlong back into a relationship that has hit a dead end, talk these feelings out, either with a friend or a professional.