Psychologists are already saying that we’re only ready to have the couple relationship we dream of when we learn to discover and love ourselves. Then, a strong woman, who may have already gone through the pain of break-ups, already knows that putting herself first is the first step to a fulfilling relationship, because without inner balance it will be impossible for life to change in our favour.
When a person puts themselves first: between benefit and selfishness or arrogance
We tend to think of a person who puts themselves first as selfish and arrogant. But is this really the case?
Because, in essence, it is very much in everyone’s best interest to take care of themselves, to pamper themselves, to nourish their soul and mind, to try to fulfil their needs, to take care of their image, their health, their sleep and so on.
From self-care is a long way to selfishness and arrogance.
Imagine having a new car. Just like you wanted. But time passes and you don’t take care of it. So the air conditioning stops working, the wheels are worn out and the brakes barely hold, and after a while the car’s engine dies just when you’re halfway to your eagerly planned holiday. You don’t know what to do, the car just won’t start… you’ll probably call a tow truck, who will take it in for service, fix it and it will all end up with a huge bill and your holiday not off to a great start.
But what would it have been like if you had taken care of your beautiful car on time? If it hadn’t worn out, if rust hadn’t touched it, if it had always been in good working order?
That’s pretty much how it is with ourselves, and the downside is that some things lost may never be recovered. That’s what can happen to our health, or wrinkles, for that matter.
Taking care of ourselves should become a cult that we all have, as this practice saves us from many inconveniences, both physical, spiritual and emotional.
You will have more confidence in yourself
Self-confidence is built in small but steady steps, each investment in yourself, regardless of the resource invested, from time to classes, education, money, contacts, etc.
It’s important to feel good about yourself and especially your life.
That’s why when you put yourself first, you will feel cared for, healthy, rested and have the resources to achieve your dreams.
You will have a more positive attitude
When you feel good about yourself, you radiate good cheer. If you are well, you see things with an inner peace of mind, you act more detached, even if just as responsibly, and you no longer feel some situations as offensive or threatening, even if your partner meant something else.
You’re more cheerful when you put yourself first, because you have time for yourself. And this will increase harmony in the couple.
You’ll know better what you want and where to draw the line
When you allow yourself to make demands, when what you want matters, when there has to be space and time for yourself, even if you are in a relationship, there are inevitably limits. Those limits with positive effects for you and for the couple, which are natural after all.
But societal norms, cultural differences can often make the woman the one who leaves too much to herself, even when she shouldn’t.
It’s time to draw a line between your personal and couple life. Even if you are two, you each have your own identity and therefore your own needs.
The more you give more attention to your needs, the happier and more fulfilled you will be, and many frustrations in your married life will disappear.
While image may not matter so much, health does.
When you put yourself first, and not just in your married life, you will obviously take better care of yourself. And this care will not only translate into beauty and a well-groomed image, but also into health. Sleeping when you’re sleepy, taking time to eat in peace, making healthy choices, setting aside time for sport – all these small gestures, which can become routine, bring health and overall well-being.
Goals you can’t delegate to anyone: from independence to couple security
When you put yourself first and become attentive to your own needs, you discover goals you can’t delegate to anyone else, because only you can do them.
If you can share household chores, trips, holidays, the budget together, self-care is up to each of you. Only you can learn and take courses for yourself, only you can advance in your career, only you can maintain your financial independence and more.