What you need to know about your partner before making a commitment


1/ Its relationship to the commitment

Does he/she want to get married? To make a pact? To have children? How many children? Does he/she want to enjoy life first? Is he or she fusional or is he or she a real lone wolf? This is probably one of the most important things to consider before making a commitment. If you are not at all on the same wavelength, learn how to detect it! Otherwise you may find yourself facing awkward differences after several years of relationship… So anticipate.

2/ Its relation to conflicts

How does he/she react once confronted with crisis situations? Admittedly in the beginning, everything often goes ideally. But certain personality traits always surface at some point… Does he/she seem violent, cowardly, dishonest, or, on the contrary, understanding and mature? Put things in perspective, you don’t want to find yourself in front of someone you don’t recognize at all once you’re faced with a problem…

3/ Its relationship to intimate life

Intimacy is an essential part of being a couple, so make sure you’re on the same page from the start! You don’t need to be similar on all subjects (libido intensity, frequency of intercourse, relationship to infidelity…), but in this case, make sure that the dialogue is clear, and that you are ready to evolve together! The compatibility of a couple is bound to evolve. So make sure that you are both going in the same direction!

4/ His love language

Communication is essential to the couple. So to prevent you at best from misunderstandings about the differences in the language of love, please refer to our article about the five languages of love!

5/ His projects

As with commitment, projects are an essential component to know before committing. There’s no point in thinking about building a future together if your projects are totally different! Unless you are ready to make a few compromises each on your own… If you are routine and he/she is ambitious, home-loving and he/she is partying etc… You are heading for some problems!

6/ His/her values

Once you are a couple, if things become serious, you will have to manage a common patrimony. So be a little pragmatic and ask yourself what it has to do with money. Is he/she stingy or spendthrift? For him/her, is it every man for himself or everything in common? If you’re looking for security and stability while he or she is living a day-to-day life, no doubt you’re heading for the wall! So anticipate 

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